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Alphaholes, or asshole alpha males, have exploded in popularity in recent years, but though the alphahole romance trope is more prolific than ever, that doesn't necessarily make it any easier to spot, especially if you're the writer.
So how do you know if your hero is an alphahole, an alpha male, or—shock horror—just a plain old asshole?
Read on to find out.
What is an alpha male?
I'll preface this definition by saying that it's changed over the years, so what I've defining is an alpha male in the year of 2025. An alpha male is a confident, mature, domineering, man-identifying character who knows what he wants and is hell-bent on getting it.
What is the alphahole romance trope?
An alphahole, by contrast, might seem outwardly confident, but internally, he might be struggling. And while he's domineering, he goes a bit OTT (over the top). He's ruthless and not afraid to be cruel to get what he wants, and sometimes that cruelty is directed toward the heroine—that's where the asshole-ness comes into the equation.
Because of their penchant for cruelty, many alphaholes also fit the morally grey character trope.
But what keeps an alphahole from dipping into the asshole category are two things: his redemption arc, and his ability to grovel.
What is a redemption arc in romance?
A redemption arc is a storyline within the romance filled with moments that offer a character the chance to work through the emotional wounds that have led to their worst or most destructive traits or moments. So for an alphahole, the redemption arc gives him the chance to show his love interest that he's no longer the man who was cruel to her, that he's changed his ways and confronted his demons. However, the key to an alphahole's redemption arc is that he still maintains his essential alpha maledom. Readers don't want to see him go from cruel and controlling to a golden retriever. They just want to see a hint of vulnerability, a hint at what made him so cruel and show him reckoning with the repercussions of that history, and what it led him to do.
And an alphahole's redemption arc is incomplete without grovelling.
What is grovelling in romance?
Only one of the most delicious romance beats of all time! And, I should note, one that doesn't belong in every romance novel. You only need a grovel when a character has reallllly and irrevocably messed things up, i.e., hurt their love interest, as alphaholes (and bullies, and stalkers) are wont to do.
Options for groveling generally fall into the five love languages: words of affirmation, physical touch, acts of service, gifts, and quality time. Of course, love interests who've been burned by an alphahole might not be super jazzed on the idea of spending time with them, so words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts, and physical touch—often in the form of very steamy scenes focused solely on the love interest's pleasure—are more common.
Why is it important to know if you're writing an alphahole?
Now that you know what an alphahole is, you might still be wondering: why does it matter? Do readers really care if a hero is an alpha vs an alphahole vs a straight-up asshole?
For some readers, alphaholes are a no-go. They won't read them. It's not their thing. And that's fine! But if you misadvertise your book as containing an alpha, when really, it's an alphahole, you risk that reader DNFing your book, or even worse, reading it and hating your hero, then spreading that hate in a review.
You want to tailor your marketing specifically for readers who love an alphahole, because they're the ones most likely to buy it (and love it).
Are there certain sub-genres where alphaholes are more common/expected?
You now know how to look out for an alphahole, and why that's important. But how do you know if your alphahole belongs in your sub-genre?
There are some sub-genres where alphaholes are prolific. Mafia romance, bully romance, stalker romance, a lot of dark romance. Steamy contemporary romance, too.
And there are some where alphaholes just don't work as well, due in part to their connection to cruelty. Sub-genres like inspirational/faith-based romance, small town romance of all steam levels, sweet contemporary, fantasy, paranormal, and historical romance; and cozy romances are beloved by readers because they're considered safer sub-genres, where readers don't have to worry as much about triggers or upsetting content, and that includes ruthless, cruel heroes, even if they do end up not quite so ruthless or cruel in the end.
There we have it. Alphaholes. A complicated, popular trope that you can now spot in your own writing, and market to readers. I'll back back later this week with another blogpost, but until then, happy reading and writing!