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Today, we're exploring one of the most common kinks (yup, I said it!) in romance: praise kink.
And like all kinks, it's pretty easy to explain what it is. It's what I'd consider a Swiss Army kink; its adaptability means it works with nearly all romance novels with at least a hint of spice.
What is the romance praise kink?
The romance praise kink is when one character derives pleasure from their lover praising them, giving them compliments, or positively affirming them in sexual situations. The praise itself might be as simple and relatively sweet as "good girl" or "good boy," or it might be a longer, more drawn-out praise of something their lover is doing, like "you're taking it so well," "I love it when you do that," or the filthier "you look so pretty with your fingers up my ___."
Are there specific sub-genres where the praise kink pops up more than others?
While you'll naturally see the praise kink more often in contemporary romance by virtue of the fact that it's the biggest sub-genre, this kink works well with all sub-genres.
If you're using the kink in its lighter form, aka the "good girl"/"good boy," it can be used in even romance novels with just 1 or 2 sex scenes, like those in moderately steamy small town contemporary romances, romantic suspense, historical romance, etc.
If, however, your praise kink is more explicit, the rest of the book will need to match that. It'd be incongruous if you had a hero telling a heroine "I love it the way your (insert body part) (insert verb) when I (insert verb); it's so (insert adjective) it makes me (insert adjective) in a sex scene, but the rest of the sex scenes are very short, very sweet, or fade to black, OR if the there's no sexual tension between the characters outside the bedroom that shos how much they want each other.
Does the praise romance kink often show up in combination with other kinks?
Oh yes. Praise kink works well with so many other kinks—free use, hotwife, BDSM, milking/lactation, cum play, breeding, pregnancy, femdom, servitude, primal play, pet play, size difference, DD/lg . . . basically any kink you can think of. You can even combine it with humiliation, though the praise will usually follow the humiliation scene.
Does the praise romance kink often show up in combination with other tropes?
You bet! Praise kink works with nearly all tropes, and one character doesn't have to be the main praiser, either. Dominant character tropes like alphas, daddies, and bosses are often the character tropes that come to mind when people think of praise kink, but any character can have a filthy mouth, regardless of who they are outside the bedroom. And there's no relationship trope that can't include a praise kink, from rejected mate to afraid to commit to mail order bride.
And the kink can be shared by all bedroom partners; it's not a case where only one partner can praise, except in the case of submissives in BDSM relationships (unless they're switches, and have temporarily switched to a dominant role).
It's extremely easy to find romance novels with praise kink to read for inspiration; there are lists upon lists with them. But be warned: your TBR will suffer.
Until next blog post, happy reading and writing!