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Updated 11 July 2024
I've covered the enemies to lovers romance trope previously on the blog, and now, I want to talk about another romance book trope: opposites attract.
An umbrella trope, if you will, i.e., one that encompasses a few tropes within it, including enemies to lovers.
You'll see the opposites attract trope all over the romance genre, as well as film and TV.
Harry Met Sally? Opposites attract.
Bridgerton Season 2? Opposites attract.
Anne and Chris from Parks and Rec? Opposites attract.
The reason it's so popular? It's one of the best tropes for creating conflict. Put two (or more) people together who initially repel each other like magnets, throw a bunch of challenges at them that force them to feel things and see each other differently, and watch them realize that oh, wait, this person (or persons) is/are actually . . . my soul mate/s?
It's less angsty than enemies to lovers, but still just as powerful for creating a romance that makes the characters really work to understand themselves and each other before they reach their happily ever after.
I could wax poetic about it for days, but instead, let's dig a little deeper into what exactly I mean by opposites.
What is the "opposites" in opposites attract?
Grumpy/sunshine. Emotionally open character/closed off character. Pessimist/optimist. Devotee to organization and order/go with the flow. Logically minded/creatively minded.
Opposites attract focuses on two or more characters whose personalities are fundamentally different and who, at first glance, seem like they have nothing in common.
Now, obviously, when we talk about these opposing traits, we're doing so by boiling characters down to very simplistic terms, and if there's one thing you can say about humans (or sentient objects/aliens/monsters/fae, etc.), it's that they're complicated.
The trope necessitates a bit of ignorance on the part of the characters. When they meet, they're not looking at each other as whole, complex beings. They're homing in on one specific characteristic.
Not seeing the wood for the trees, if you will.
The characters see each other as being "one thing," and their "one thing" clashes, creating tension, which they react to with feelings that, over the course of the story, grow from frustration into love.
You can, of course, have characters who are opposites in lighter ways; baker/bread hater,
Wait. So is grumpy/sunshine a type of opposites attract romance?
Yup. Is that confusing? Yes!
Basically, some romance tropes evolved out of a more general trope, or vis versa. Opposites attract is a general trope, whereas grumpy/sunshine and enemies to lovers are more specific types of the trope, with their own particular nuances that affect the romance and character development.
What makes the grumpy/sunshine trope different from the opposites attract trope?
I've got a whole blog post on the grumpy/sunshine trope, but basically, grumpy/sunshine is a specific type of opposites attract, where the characters see each other, and the author wants the readers to see the characters as, grumpy and sunshine at the beginning of the book.
What makes the opposites attract trope different from the enemies to lovers romance trope?
Enemies to lovers romances require an inciting incident to explain why the characters hate each other.
Whereas in a general opposites attract romance, your focus is on writing characters who seem at first like they have nothing in common, and then plotting story beats that show them slowly discovering their shared interests, thoughts, and backgrounds.
Can the opposites attract trope work for all romance novels, regardless of sub-genre?
Yes, this trope works with every sub-genre. As long as you're writing about sentient beings, you can incorporate opposites attract into the storyline.
Are there particular sub-genres of romance where the opposites attract trope is more popular?
Tropes go in and out of favor, but opposites attract is an evergreen trope that you'll reliably see across romance's sub-genres, regardless of year or other trends. It's a great all-rounder, because again, as long as you have sentient beings, you can make them differ from each other in interesting ways.
Are there other tropes that work well with the opposites attract trope?
Slow burn works really well with opposites attract; because the opposites attract is predicated on the characters really knowing each other before they fall in love, it lends itself well to a slower-paced romance plot.
That isn't to say that you can't use the trope if you write fast-burn (that is not a phrase, but maybe if I use it enough it will be?), insta-lust or insta-love romances. If you're using these tropes in combination with opposites attract, your characters might not realize just how opposite they are at the start of the book. Maybe it's only after they've had sex, or confessed their feelings, that they realize just how far apart their worldviews are, and what they'll have to go through to see beyond it.
What books can you read to see the opposites attract trope in action?
Three books that do a fantastic job with the opposites attract trope are:
Dating Dr. Dil by Nisha Sharma
The Professor Next Door by Jackie Lau
Heart of the Steal by Avon Gale and Roan Parrish
While you're reading these, record your impressions of the main characters' similarities and differences at the beginning, middle, and end of the book. Then, once you've read the happily ever after, go back through your notes and see how your impressions changed throughout the story. Now think about the characters' impressions of each other. Which story beats made them see each other differently? How did each beat affect the characters' emotional and physical connection?
Keep your notes nearby as you start plotting your opposites attract romance; it'll help you decide how you want your readers to understand your characters, and your characters to understand each other, at different points in the story.
Until the next post, happy reading and writing!